Johnny, our six-year-old son, has embarked on his educational journey. Having graduated from a private Montessori kindergarten, we now stand at the crossroads of choosing between a public or private primary school for him. Before we delve into our reasoning, let me give you a bit of background on Sunshine and myself. We both come from middle class families and both attended public primary schools. Sunshine then attended a public gymnasium and lyceum in Lakatamia, while I attended the GC School of Careers, which is a private high school in Nicosia. Sunshine then completed her undergraduate degree at the University of Cyprus and then moved on for Masters and PhD at Sheffield and Cambridge respectively. My university studies were all in the UK, at Southampton, LSE and Warwick. Needless to say, Sunshine is far and away the most academically established in our family.

While private schools in Cyprus come with a hefty price tag, they remain within our financial reach—provided we manage prudently our financials. For the sake of simplicity, let’s momentarily set aside the high fees as the decisive factor in our conversation, although they undeniably play a significant role. It’s also worth noting that both Sunshine and I share the view that the public primary education system in Cyprus operates at an acceptable level. However, the same cannot be confidently asserted for secondary education.

During our discussion, we grappled with the delicate balance between two seemingly complementary aspects of education. In Cyprus, however, they often clash. The first aspect revolves around the academic opportunities—abundant in private schools due to smaller class sizes and individualized attention. The second aspect is broader: an awareness of societal dynamics and a well-rounded understanding of our world. Public primary schools, with their diverse student body representing various socioeconomic backgrounds, foster this holistic awareness. Contrary, many kids who graduate from, private primary schools, seem detached from the “real society”; or at least that was my experience from classmates from GC School who graduated from private primary schools.

Being detached from society, while ideologically problematic, will not cause any practical problems if the student-to-be-adult can be guaranteed a prosperous life. This may be the case for children of super rich families who have enough means to care for generations down the line. These individuals, while handicapped in terms of social awareness, they can still live full lives, supporting themselves and mingling only with their peers. To each, their own. Our children, devoid of such financial insulation, must be equipped with essential skills to not only survive but also actively contribute to societal progress, and being detached from the realities of everyday life, would be a disadvantage that would curtail their future autonomy.

Drawing from the considerations outlined earlier, we’ve made a deliberate choice for Johnny’s education. Starting next year, he’ll attend the nearby public primary school. Simultaneously, we decided that when the time comes, he can opt for a private secondary school if he desires and if our financials at the time allow it. The driving force behind this decision is to improve his life-chances. Let me elaborate. Undoubtedly, top private high schools academically surpass their public counterparts. This much is largely uncontested. Equally non-controversial is their provision of extracurricular activities, enriching students’ holistic development. However, what’s similarly—if not more—crucial, albeit admittedly more controversial, is the social networking made available through these schools. These institutions foster connections that extend far beyond graduation, shaping futures and opening doors.

Similarly, there is one final aspect to consider, and it revolves around the cultivation of ambition. We often compare experiences with Sunshine. For my peers and me, the path was clear from the outset: we would dedicate ourselves to academic pursuits, aiming for admission to reputable universities and eventual rewarding careers. Academic success was something to be admired, not to be looked down upon. However, Sunshine’s experience differs as most of her classmates did not aspire to further studies, and students who were high performers were considered “uncool”. Though I strongly believe the drive for success is cultivated at home, I would nevertheless prefer to have him at a school that fosters the will for advancement and instils a thirst for knowledge.

In conclusion, I wish to address a frequently voiced sentiment, particularly prevalent in Cyprus: the notion that “those who are good will not be lost.” This implies that high-achieving students will thrive regardless of whether they attend public or private schools. I wholeheartedly agree, and Sunshine is a living testament to this belief. However, the issue lies elsewhere, namely on those average and below-average students who might need support. Top-tier private secondary schools offer the necessary structures to empower these students, ensuring that they will reach their maximum potential, minimizing the risk of “getting lost” along the way. I hope my children do not fall within these categories, but if they do, as many children inevitably do, I would like to offer them the maximum support possible, which is only available at private high schools.

This is part of a series of entries titled Fatherhood Diaries where I record thoughts on life as a new dad. Click here for all the Fatherhood Diaries.